Are you best friends with benefits?

Friends with benefits is common among men and women these days.
A guy or a lady can have a best friend that he or she is so close that they can talk to them about anything, from exes to bad sex and bad break ups. A friend with benefits is someone you are comfortable with.
Below are stories of people who became best friends with benefits.
Kelechi: We meet up and have a good time, no strings attached
I have become very close to a male friend I have known for over five years. Actually, we are practically best friends since we share almost everything with each other. We talk everyday like best friends would. We have both been single for over two years, so we are open including talking about sex.
We would talk about different types of sex, positions and toys that we have tried with our partners. I basically treat him like one of my girl friends. But because we are so close to one another, we didn’t think it would be wise to start dating. A few months ago, he got me a vibrator for my birthday. I thought it was a funny joke but assured him I would make good use of his present. But he wanted to make sure himself that his expensive gift would be put to good use.
In actual fact, he would like to use it on me. Well, I asked him whether or not he wanted more from our friendship. He said that I wasn’t a stranger to him. So, I allowed him, and we had sex. We had sex many more times after that. To us, there are no feelings attached. We meet up and have a good time. He is with his girlfriend and my boyfriend knows my heart belongs to him, but my friend remains my friend, sex and all.
Tokunbo: I just want my sexual needs met, no feelings
I don’t want a relationship, I just want my needs met. I have way too much going on for a relationship and don’t want to get tied down. I have a girl who has been my friend for a while now. We spend time together after work because our offices are close. Many people actually think we are dating but she is just my friend, my confidant and partner in breaking hearts.
Given the hurt I suffered from my last relationship, I don’t want to get emotionally attached to any lady I hook up with now, especially if I know going into a relationship will not be anything more than sex. Recently, my friend and I were just at my house when I slut in a music and she turned all romantic on me. We made love but we talked about later. It was sex, nothing more. None of us expect a commitment from the other. We are both not ready for a relationship but we enjoy each other’s company and the sex of course.
Felicia: My bestie is marrying the woman of his dreams
I have been in love with my friend for over three years. We have been friends with benefits for two years now. Over the years, he always assumed we were just friends and as for me, I agreed with everything he said because I loved him. He told me two weeks ago, he was getting married to a girl he was into for many years. She finally accepted his proposal.
I was devastated when he told me the news. I decided then I would cut him off because I could not handle it emotionally. I just wanted to crawl up in a hole and cry. So I cut him off. It was only a week since he didn’t hear from me. He got upset and came to see me. He said he was hurt I stopped talking to him. He still wants us to be friends and couldn’t understand why I didn’t want to carry on as we were. He didn’t think it was a big deal that he was getting married but we could still maintain being friends. He couldn’t forget me and he will never erase me from his life.
I have been sleeping with him for awhile. I couldn’t imagine being introduced as his friend to his wife. He said everything will be normal and even I will get married and it will eventually all work out. He still wants me around even though he’s marrying the woman of his dreams. I just have to stay by his side as his friend. We are good.
Jennifer: I broke up with my friend
I was in a relationship very similar to this until months ago. I was unrealistically hopeful that we were just friends with benefits and that we didn’t have feelings for each other. I’m somewhat ashamed that I refused to read the writing on the wall. We shared things in common. We helped each other out without counting the costs and we also share the bed whenever we visit each other.
But along the line, things started getting heated between us. He was acting like my boyfriend and trying to know how many men I spoke to, the ones I had feelings for and the ones I had interest in dating. I had to break up my friendship with him because he was crossing the line. We still talk but not like before.
Obiora: She’s like a sister to me
I have a close female friend who is an angel to me. She has been with me for over five years now. She is like my sister, confidante and helper. She does house chores for me, shops for me, cleans my closet and even sleeps over at my house. She’s an attractive young woman and I just love being with her.
We have been intimate a few times, nothing serious really but we keep our feelings in check. She has a boyfriend who loves her, who knows me, who approves of our being close friends. I also have a lady I want to marry that knows how close we are. The sex aspect just happened because we are humans and have these urges, but we respect each other’s decisions and space.
Although we don’t relate as much as we do in the past, because she is preparing for her wedding, she knows I have her back anytime, and any day. She can tell me anything bothering her, and we seek solutions together.


I am a writer, a journalist and phenomenal woman. I don't conform to societal stereotypes. I am passionate about women and the issues that plague womanhood in this part of the world. Engage and be awakened.

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