“Woman, your work is your first husband” says Mavi Isibor

For a woman, having work is as important as having a husband. “Your work is your first husband”, my mother used to say.

I know many people, especially ladies will not agree with me and indeed most will lash out at me but the truth is always a bitter pill to swallow.

Some women will disagree with me because it is expected of them not because that is what they truly believe.

Whatever your position is, the truth is work is more defining and fulfilling for a purpose driven life. Nothing can be more exhilarating and liberating as having money that you earned in your pocket.

Of course earning your own money is good for all the obvious reasons; financial backup for family purse, contributes to family expenses, contributes financially to the society and economy, role model for the girl child and so much more. Internally however, there is a lot more going on for the financially independent woman.

Woman your work is your first husband

First and foremost, being financially independent empowers a woman to make her own decisions, own and execute them without having to wait for support or permission from someone else.

This means that you will be more likely to try out new things that you want because you in time develop confidence that cannot be taught through any other means. This also means that you will have more experience than a less independent lady.

For enterprise minded women like me, this confidence opens your mind to taking bigger risks and charting unbeaten paths that eventually returns bigger rewards. You can afford to dream and dream big.

You can dare to aspire to greater heights while seeing obstacles as things to overcome. It’s your playing field not someone else’s.

Secondly, self-value and self-esteem are crucial ingredients for self-awareness. If you don’t know who you are, you are likely to accept everything thrown at you by life; you know, not knowing that you can make lemonade from lemons?

Having your own money can help increase your self- value and self-esteem and help you achieve financial, emotional, social, career and personal independence. It gives you a sense of accomplishment that eventually changes how you rate yourself and how others see you.

There is an increased self-worth that comes with being financially independent that boosts your self-concept and self mastery. A healthy self esteem holds true Eleanor Roosevelt’s saying that “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

Thirdly, it enables you to live life not to merely exist. Not having your own money makes you lose yourself, it makes you listless and needy.

A needy person can be an emotionally draining companion. You become self reliant, your mind is free to explore possibilities and you are comfortable with who and what you are when you are financially independent.

I read about a lady who always complained that her stomach churned anytime she wanted to ask her husband for money. Imagine having everything including your every need and dreams tied to one man! What happens when the inevitable happens? Have a life sister, be wise.

Written by Mavi Isibor

Kate

I am a writer, a journalist and phenomenal woman. I don't conform to societal stereotypes. I am passionate about women and the issues that plague womanhood in this part of the world. Engage and be awakened.

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