Glaring signs you are not ready to get married

For many women, getting married is one of the biggest things they look up to as they become adults. Whether you are the type who has fantasized about your wedding day since you were a child or have been obsessed with loving images of walking down the aisle ever since you met the man who ticks all your boxes, you should know that getting married is a serious issue.

But what happens when you are finally on your way to the altar, but you aren’t exactly sure if it’s the right decision at that point? What happens when you suddenly realize that even though you love your partner, you don’t see yourself spending the rest of your life with him?

To help you clear that confusion on time, there are certain signs to look for that will give you a clear picture as to whether you are really ready to get married, or not. If any of the signs below apply to you, you may need to apply the brakes on your wedding until things become clear.

*If you are more focused on the wedding than the marriage, you may not be ready to get married just yet. As much as we try to avoid it, many people get so wrapped up in the actual wedding that they neglect to put the same care, effort and commitment into the marriage. This is one of the signs you should not get married.

It is natural for some women to go into extreme planning mode to ensure that they have the wedding they have always dreamed about, but they also have to be very conscious of the fact that they are pledging their lives to another person forever.

If the wedding is more important to you than the marriage, you are definitely not ready to get married at all. Instead save yourself the stress and finances, take a step back and ask yourself what about marriage truly appeals to you. If you are struggling to find the answers, it means it is not the time to say “I do.”

*Being pressured by family and friends into marriage when you are not ready is a wrong move. Whether the pressure is coming from your already married friends or your parents who are anxious to see you settle down, outside influences and judgment can easily prompt you to make a life time commitment to someone hastily instead of moving at your own pace.

As an adult who knows what you want in life, you must develop a thick skin and stop allowing others tell you how to live your life. It doesn’t even matter if these people are your parents. This is how people end up in bad and dysfunctional marriages. Ignore the opinions of others and follow what your heart says and if that means putting off marriage, then so be it.

Many women feel like they are racing against time to beat the fertility clock before menopause hits. Society, as well as family and friends are also guilty of making women feel like their time is running out when it comes to marriage. Rushing into marriage statistics is not a list you want to be part of.

After you reach a certain age, you may start to go into panic mode because you are not married, but you shouldn’t. Just because some people found their soul mates and got married earlier doesn’t mean that you won’t find the same later in life. Stop focusing on a ticking clock and instead focus on finding a mate that truly completes you. If marriage is in the cards, it will come.

Signs you are not ready to get married

*One of the main components of a successful marriage is compromise. But if you are unwilling to compromise on some things in your relationship, whether big or small, chances are you are not ready for such an important commitment as marriage.

When you are single you don’t have to compromise and even when you are dating you may be able to get away with being uncompromising. However, marriage is totally different, as it requires love, respect and support of both parties. If you are unwilling to do this, putting marriage off for the time being is probably for the best.

*If you don’t have a solid relationship foundation, you have no business getting married. For a marriage to last, there has to be a solid foundation. A grounded foundation can help you get through the rough patches and challenges marriage brings and you need your foundation to be rock-solid if you plan to get married.

To put it in simpler terms, if things are already shaky in your relationship, getting married is definitely not going to fix it. Put your energy into to repairing the problems in your relationship first before you even think of exchanging vows. Working on your relationship issues is one of the signs a woman is ready for marriage.

*Couples who don’t discuss their respective morals and values before marriage shouldn’t get married. This is a conversation that should be had early on in the relationship because if your morals and values differ greatly from your partner, then you need to decide if things should continue at all.

Issues like religion, disciplining children and family commitments can vary greatly between two people and if neither party is willing to change or at least compromise, marriage is not advised. Your morals and values are who you are and you shouldn’t feel like you have to change them just because you so desperately want to get married.

*If you are still attracted to other people, please don’t get married. You might end up hurting your partner. As a human being, there are times you see someone attractive, you look and admire, but there is a huge difference between acknowledging someone good-looking and being completely attracted to someone else besides your partner.

This is a gateway to cheating and you shouldn’t go into a marriage when you are still so easily tempted by others. Actually, you might need to be single for awhile until you get the attraction to others out of your system because if not, all of your relationships are likely to fail.

*If you don’t trust your partner, why do you want to get married to them? Trust is one of the most important components of a successful relationship and you need it if you want your marriage to last. Regardless of the reason why the trust in your relationship is lacking or nonexistent, it needs to be repaired before you even think about getting married.

*You can be in relationship with someone for years and still don’t know them well. It happens. You get so swept up in the intoxicating feelings of love that you decide on a permanent commitment like marriage when you don’t even really know the person. 

If you are already engaged but don’t know your partner well, you need to slow down on the wedding plans and take time to truly get to know each other. Relationships aren’t all kisses and happy times; you need to get down from the clouds before you can make the lifetime commitment of marriage.

*If you are ready to get married but boyfriend is not, move on with your life. Aside signs you’re ready for marriage, if your man is not on the same page with you, there’s no point rushing to the altar. Also, when you say ‘I’m not ready to get married but he is, you should let your man know and stop wasting his time. There are not ready for marriage quotes for people who don’t want marriage.

Kate

I am a writer, a journalist and phenomenal woman. I don't conform to societal stereotypes. I am passionate about women and the issues that plague womanhood in this part of the world. Engage and be awakened.

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