10 mistakes women make when choosing life partners
Many women make mistakes when choosing life partners. There are some couples who have no business living together and having children just because they felt it was the correct thing to do.
Some men are still tied to their mothers’ apron strings that they don’t know what it means to leave and cleave. They still insist that their mothers run their homes and relegate their wives to the background.
There are women who just got married not because they want to enjoy companionship with their partners but because they felt menopause was approaching and they needed children.
Whatever the inappropriate reasons you chose when you decided to get married, making mistakes when choosing a spouse has wrecked many lives and destroyed promising futures.
Choosing a life partner is a complicated task. It can determine your perpetual state of happiness or unhappiness for many years. If you end up with a bad spouse, you will live in misery.
It is sad that as important as it is to choose a good spouse, people are still making mistakes while making one of the biggest decisions of their life.
1. One of the mistakes people make while choosing life partners is not knowing what they want from a relationship. It can be hard to know what exactly you seek from a relationship when you haven’t been in many serious relationships and lack the experience to understand what you truly want. Not knowing what you want from a relationship can cause problems for both of you in the future.
2. Another mistake is believing too much in romance and romance stories. Society teaches people to put too much faith in Romance. Ladies want to be swept off their feet like the characters they read about in different novels. And if things don’t happen the way they expect them to after watching romance movies and reading romance novels, they believe they are with the wrong guy.
3. This society compels you to choose a partner from the people around you. You are expected to choose your spouse from your church or mosque, from your tribe or from your circle of friends. But following society’s rigid dating rule-book will rob you the chances of meeting someone outside your social circle who may be a great match for you.
4. It is sad that this society prioritizes settling down instead of being with the right person. You are pressured to get married before you are too old not when you find the right person. It is more acceptable to be married and unhappy about the time you are 30 than remaining single and happy. You might marry the wrong person before a certain age than marry the right one later if you follow the dictates of society.
5. Another mistake people make while choosing a life partner is racing against the biological clock. For women, it’s particularly cruel if they want to have children with their husbands. It sets a time frame for them to select a life partner, usually before they turn 40. What these ladies refuse to understand is that it is already stressful enough finding a life partner without having to worry about risky pregnancies and menopause, the added pressure pushes them to rush into any relationship that will lead to marriage and many of them end up in toxic and abusive marriages in the long run.
6. This is one of the mistakes that can cost you a beautiful relationship if you are not careful. Some people make the mistake of not completely sorting out their past. It is not right to get married and still be thinking about hooking up with your ex. If you loved your ex so much, why didn’t you marry him? You shouldn’t get married and still be imagining your life with your ex or asking how to forget your ex on different social media platforms. This is what you get when you keep jumping from one relationship to other without completely sorting out your past. Marriage is a big decision you should take when you are completely sure about your feelings.
7. Another mistake some people make when choosing life partners is assuming that marriage will change a person. If you think that marriage is some magic wand that will change your partner, abandon that idea. Don’t mess up your life. Marriage will change you and your spouse. It depends on you both if it will be for better or worse. As a matter of fact, marriage significantly amplifies the negative traits in a person.
8. Enduring violence is one of the biggest mistakes women make while choosing life partners.If the man you want to marry slaps and disrespects you without blinking, marriage won’t change him. He will beat you until you see your ancestors when you eventually marry him. The ring won’t change him, don’t be fooled. If your partner has some issues you absolutely hate, think twice before marrying that person. Don’t entangle yourself in an uncomfortable union. Change has to come from within a person. They have to decide to change and work towards it for the change to be possible.
9. Don’t also make the mistake of assuming the person you will get married to will remain the same person in 10 years time a big mistake. Circumstances change, people change. Life affects people in different ways. Situations changes people for better or worse. Have it at the back of your mind that your spouse will change after you get married. If you are going to get married, bear it in mind that the person will change, and that’s not going to stop you from loving him.
10. Marrying for looks is a wrong reason. Choosing a spouse for the wrong reasons will cause you to make mistakes. Are you marrying the person because he looks good, or he’s wealthy?That marriage is doomed to fail even before it began.
11. Ignoring the importance of chemistry is another mistake people make when choosing life partners. Sometimes, when things are going really bad, it’s the only thing that keeps the relationship alive.It’s not just sex, it’s being able to laugh together even when things are not going well and being confident that you have each other’s backs when the chips are down.
Usually, when you find the right person, the decision is easy. You know you have found the one deep within you. There’s no drama, no fears, no confusion, and no regrets. You feel like you finally have found your home when you meet the right person. Ladies, avoid these mistakes when choosing a life partner to avoid stories that touch the heart.