Marriage is not a reward for well behaved women

Marriage is not a reward for well behaved women. Nigerian parents should stop raising sons with the mentality that marriage is what they reward women with for being nice.

Stop raising your sons to feel entitled to a woman’s support because they can marry them when things are finally in place to reward them for sticking by their sides.

Read this…

“Dear Parents,

Please teach your sons how to cook.

Nobody gave birth to a daughter to come and cook for them.

I did not carry a cook in my stomach for 9 months for your son.

Do right by your son and give him the keys to the kitchen.

Marriage is not a reward for well behaved women

We are teaching our daughters how to make money.

So there’ll be no need for all those rubbish shade and sub about growing with a poor man until he hammers.

No need for those silly pictures about patiently loving a man when he rides on Okada, so she can enjoy the rewards of her loyalty when he buys a Benz.

Our daughters are not waiters. They are not waiting for anybody to hammer.

Our daughters gan-gan will hammer.

They will buy their own Lamborghini.

Let everybody be self-sufficient in that generation.

Let all this trade by barter relationships end and die by fire.

And while you are at it…

Tell your sons they are not the head of any house.

Our daughters are very smart.

Their head is good enough.

Everybody and their head. Period.

They will have no use for servility.

Most importantly…

Tell them slut-shaming is the quickest way to know a cretin.

Our daughters will be free!

They will not be nice to misogynists rara!

Oh! Before I forget…

Please teach your sons that marriage is not a reward they give to well-behaved women.

Marriage is not a reward. End of.

It is not something my daughters will aspire to.

And personally, I have no interest in raising “nice” women.

If we hate the narrative of this era we are in…

Then we can train our children to construct better narratives.

Let’s do the work.

O se.

By Joy Isi Bewaji




I am a woman who is passionate about empowering other women to live their best lives and be free from unhealthy societal expectations. I'm a journalist and a columnist with a reputable media house. I educate, inspire and encourage women to embrace their uniqueness fully. I am a mother to an intelligent girl. I love perfumes.

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1 Response

  1. Ebube says:

    This woman speaks the truth

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