Dear Nigerian women, forced love is not love

Dear Nigerian women, forced love is not love. If you have chase a man for love, beg him to love you, beg him to respect you, beg him to treat you right, what you are feeling is not love, it’s desperation to be in a relationship or marriage at all costs.

Women, chased love is not love. If you have to run after it, talk it into staying, cry for it to be reciprocated, remind it of your value, fight alone to keep the relationship for both of you, test it or issue ultimatums, it’s not love.

That’s not love. That’s not a healthy relationship. That’s not being happy. That’s your low self esteem at work. It’s not fair that you live that way.

It’s not fair for you to waste your time and productive years that way. It is not fair to waste your love on an undeserving person that way. It’s not fair for you to lose out on being truly loved in the future by a worthy person.

forced love is not love

When I see women desperately try to keep men in their lives, I pity them. You shouldn’t be begging for love. Love should be mutual.

There’s nothing as emotionally draining and degrading as begging a man who doesn’t want to be with you to stay in your life.

You don’t have to beg for love. You don’t have to beg to be loved. If what you are feeling for the other person is not reciprocated, leave.

You don’t have to beg someone to be with you. That person is not your oxygen. You have your whole life ahead of you. Learn to let go of unrequited love.

You don’t have to beg for attention, affection and commitment. Don’t beg someone to come back to you or stay with you. Learn to love yourself above any relationship.

If someone doesn’t willingly give you the love, attention and affection you give to them, they are not worth your time. Leave that person alone.

No one is worth such wasted efforts. Stop groveling and begging for love from anyone who doesn’t want to be with you. Stay away from that person.

Move on with your life. You are better off on your own. Live free. Do something productive with your life and time. Your future will thank you for it.

Woman, forced love is not love. Stop hurting yourself. Forced love exposes you to abuse. Forced love messes with your self worth. Forced loved leaves you exhausted. Forced love will destroy your life. Choose wisely.


I am a woman who is passionate about empowering other women to live their best lives and be free from unhealthy societal expectations. I'm a journalist and a columnist with a reputable media house. I educate, inspire and encourage women to embrace their uniqueness fully. I am a mother to an intelligent girl. I love perfumes.

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