Don’t let anyone tell you that it’s a bad thing to be competitive
Dear woman, don’t let anyone tell you that it’s a bad thing to be competitive. Everyone wants to win. In fact, you are alive because a sperm out-swam others to get to an egg.
That is life for you. You’re here to win. Unless you are in it to fail. Then, this message is not for you.
Yes, there’s healthy and unhealthy competition. It becomes unhealthy when you think you must win all the time, you can’t accept failure, and you can’t accept another person winning while you come after them.
It’s unhealthy when you allow failure keep you down and you don’t dust yourself up and try again, you sit there and get jealous of those winning or look for ways to bring them down.
That being said, go for that finish line, girl. Compete with all you’ve got. The beautiful thing is that when you’re doing your thing for yourself, and for those who look up to you, and for your gender, you won’t have time to be looking at other people’s fails or wins.
The nonsense narrative that women shouldn’t compete when it comes to other women is tired. Let’s dead it abeg. Right from primary school, they make us compete against each other, female and male alike.
We’re all running for first position, for best grades, for best scores in sports, for the best desk in class, for prefect badges, et al. But we grow up and suddenly, we’re no longer eligible to compete for what we want?
We take the backseat while men push forward to win and take positions we can all have? And when those of us who have worked hard to be where we are get there, we’re told that we’re not supporting other women because we’re too competitive?
By all means, support other women. We need more women doing that, even though we already have women uplifting other women. But do it because you believe in that person or because you are comfortable giving them a hand raise. Not because you’re pressured to.
And please, don’t stop pushing yourself hard to win, even if you’re in the midst of other women.
And if you are in a situation where you have to go head to head with anyone, female or male, give it your best shot. Don’t make yourself less just because you are a woman. Give it everything.
Don’t stop competing.
Written by Sally Kenneth Dadzie