If you fight for his attention, you will continue fighting to keep him by your side

Ladies, if you have to fight for a man’s attention even when he’s clearly not interested in you, you are on a very long thing.

If you struggle to date him, scheme to get his attention and fight for him to notice you, then you will fight to have him and you will continue fighting to keep him interested in you. That’s too much effort on your part to keep the relationship going.

You may succeed in dating this guy or even marrying him but in the end, you will live an unhappy life. You will suddenly realise that you have just wasted your time, your life and your love for the wrong person.

You can’t compete with a woman a man is in love with. He may succeed in plating games with you but his heart is not with you. He will treat you shabbily while he will treat his woman like she deserves.

If you have to beg for someone’s attention because you want to be in a relationship, you don’t need that kind of relationship. If the feeling is not mutual, you are setting yourself up for pain, tears and heartache later on.

I always tell young Nigerian ladies to stop fighting for men’s attention not because I’m anti relationship or anti marriage but because I don’t like women shortchanging themselves in relationships.

It takes two willing, committed and loyal people to make a relationship work. You don’t have to entangle yourself in a situationship and later turn around to start crying that you were deceived and used.

If you fight for his attention, you will continue fighting to keep him


Know you deserve better on time and move on time. You don’t have to fight to have and keep a man who truly loves you because he’s always busy seeking for new ways to make you happy.

Cultivate the courage to stand tall as a woman and do what’s right for you and not what is expected of you by people who won’t live with the results of your decisions.

Forget this society and the pressure that comes from different quarters about getting married at all costs. Getting married is not the problem, the issue is living a fulfilled and happy life afterwards.

Who are you getting married to? Are you both compatible? Do you share the same values, goals and dreams? Can this man bring out the best in you? Can you count on your spouse to be truly there for you when you go through tough and difficult moments in your life?

Can you trust your spouse or you sleep with one eye open are marrying a he goat who doesn’t respect you? Can you trust your spouse with your daughters? Can you trust your spouse with your sisters and house helps?

Dear single lady, you are the only one who will live with the consequences of your decisions. Stop trying to meet up with society’s expectation by fighting to get a man’s attention because you want to get married.

If a man is not interested in you, fighting for his attention and craving his love is a waste of time. He will hurt you in the end and leave you high and dry. I know that’s not what you truly want for yourself.

Begging for attention in a relationship is not what you should do to yourself. You should know your worth. You are unique. You are the best of your kind.

Live your life like the Queen that you are and stop fighting to get an unwilling man’s attention. Such relationships end in premium tears. Don’t be a willing victim. Protect your heart please.


I am a woman who is passionate about empowering other women to live their best lives and be free from unhealthy societal expectations. I'm a journalist and a columnist with a reputable media house. I educate, inspire and encourage women to embrace their uniqueness fully. I am a mother to an intelligent girl. I love perfumes.

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