Don’t feel bad for taking decisions about your life that upset other people

Dear Nigerian woman, don’t ever feel bad for taking hard decisions about your life even though it upsets other people.

You cannot please everyone. That’s a recipe for unhappiness. You are responsible for your happiness and not theirs.

Anyone who wants you to live in misery for their own happiness shouldn’t be in your life to begin with.

They will suck you dry and abandon you when they are done with you. And then turn around to blame you for their actions.


You know those people who love to take and grab from others without offering anything in return, run from them.

You need to stop enabling those who feel entitled about receiving assistance from others without planning for their lives and future.

It is not selfishness. It is being true to yourself and others. You can’t keep investing in others while they keep leaving you emotionally bankrupt.

That’s not the best way to live your life. You deserve all the love, care and attention you give to others so you won’t end up bitter and bankrupt. Think about it.


Nothing annoys me more than when someone expects you to be okay with something that they won’t take from you if the tables were turned.

And the most pathetic ones are those who try to use Bible verses to stampede you into allowing them back into your life while chanting forgive and forget like it’s going out fashion.

If you know you can’t take it, don’t dish it out to someone else. No one is your garbage collector. We are all striving to be better. So miss me with your forgive and forget anthem. I don’t believe in it.

Nigerian women should learn the art of taking hard decisions about their lives and relationships without trying to please people who are hurting them. It’s not worth the stress.


I am a woman who is passionate about empowering other women to live their best lives and be free from unhealthy societal expectations. I'm a journalist and a columnist with a reputable media house. I educate, inspire and encourage women to embrace their uniqueness fully. I am a mother to an intelligent girl. I love perfumes.

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2 Responses

  1. Ebube says:

    thank you

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