According to tradition, it is the man who is expected to propose to a woman. The woman is expected to show initial resistance before she gives in no matter how much she loves the man.
A woman who proposes to a man is seen as cheap and desperate. If a woman’s proposal is accepted and problems arise later in the relationship, most men retort that they didn’t want the relationship in the first place and that it was the woman who forced herself on him.
Some singles share their views below.
Kelechi: A woman should wait to be proposed to
I don’t think a woman should ask a man to marry her. She should wait until he asks her. It is sweeter that way. If she proposes, does he get a diamond ring? Does she get to plan the wedding the way she wants after stampeding the man into marriage? Would she have a say in that union later on? Is it not a sign of desperation? Ladies, leave well enough alone and when he is ready and wants to marry you, he will ask. Everything comes at its appointed time
Akinwale: Any woman who proposes to a man is desperate
According to tradition, it is the man who is expected to propose. The woman is expected to show initial resistance before she gives in no matter how much she loves the man. A woman who proposes to a man is cheap and desperate.
If a woman’s proposal is accepted and problems arise later in the relationship, most men retort that they didn’t want the relationship in the first place and that it was the woman who forced herself on him. A man can use it to insult you. This can be humiliating. Therefore, for a woman irrespective of her worth, fame, beauty and academic qualification, the psychological element remains – a woman wants to be proposed to and not otherwise.
Chinyere: A woman should propose to her man so he won’t keep wasting her time
The greatest emotional need of a woman is a relationship. But in this time of gender equality, where women have successfully invaded all areas traditionally reserved for men, there is nothing wrong with a woman seeking the desire of her heart. Put your pride and traditional norms away because nothing can be more important than matters of the heart. What a man can do, a woman can do better. If a man suppresses his emotions and has great difficulty telling a woman he loves her, she should help him out. If a man loves you but finds it difficult to propose, then man up, and propose to him so he won’t keep wasting your time.
Emmanuel: If a man wants to marry you, he will propose
If a man wants to propose to you, then he will do it without threats or intimidation. Women need to be patient and quiet, even if they don’t think a man is moving fast enough. A woman should also set a time limit in her mind and move on with her life if she is no longer satisfied with the relationship. Keep the marriage threats and intimidation out of the relationship.
Pressuring a man to marry you after a few months, or weeks is crazy. Discussing marriage after a year is okay provided your relationship has grown and you are curious about what your man is thinking and you want to let him know that you want a real family.
Margaret: If you love him enough to marry him, propose to him
If you find someone you love, go after him relentlessly. It is better to try and lose than to live in regret. Nowadays, there are more eligible women than men. Relationship manhunt has become very competitive. If you just sit there for someone to come and propose, time may pass you by. In the end, you will be no match for younger and more sophisticated women.
If you are ready for marriage and have prayed about it, the time to look for your spouse is now. The only way to play the game is to be on the field. If you find a man you love enough to marry, propose to him. Take the bull by the horns before it slips through your fingers. The bottom line is that anybody can propose. Love goes beyond sex and gender. True love is all that matters.
Ikenna: Why drag him to the altar if he’s not ready?
Women propose marriage most of the time. Sure, the man will get down on one knee and ask her to marry him, but from my experience, it is women who usually bring up the idea of marriage first.
The man’s proposal is merely a formality at that point. Sometimes the man will agree to marriage without any additional discussion, and at other times, the woman has to do some additional arm-twisting.
So, it is completely normal to propose marriage to your boyfriend. If you don’t, most men will be happy with the status quo, dating indefinitely. But ladies should also think about life afterwards.
Is that the kind of marriage relationship you want, where you have to drag him to the altar? Don’t you think it could affect the marriage, how well he treats you after getting married etc? When women do this, I feel it makes men think that the man is out of her league, and he was settling for her, even though that’s often not the case but psychologically, that’s what he will likely think.
Onyedikachi: Don’t pester a man to marry you
Ladies, stop dragging, pestering or begging a man to marry you. It’s not going to work out.
Let the man be the man and make his decisions whether to marry you or not. Let him move at his own pace and if it’s too slow, leave or take a seat.
Please, do not try to force a man to marry you. It won’t end well.
Gbenga: A woman who proposes to a man is settling for less
Any woman who drags a man kicking and screaming to the altar is the woman who is ultimately settling. She is settling for a man who doesn’t really want to be with her, all because she invested a number of years.
If a man puts out the disclaimer earlier on like, “I’m not looking for anything serious, “I can’t predict how I will feel a year from now, then bail, before you invest and waste time in a relationship with an unwilling partner.
There’s nothing wrong if a woman proposes to her man. Nigerian men need to loosen up and stop yapping about tradition nonsense.