Marrying for the wrong reasons is the worst thing you can do to yourself. Marriage is a big step in anyone’s life and it is not a decision that should be taken lightly. Getting married means you are committing yourself totally to a relationship with one person for the rest of your lives.
This is why I get angry when nosy, busy body Nigerians hound ladies to go and get married. Is marriage a ticket to heaven? Why should a person’s life and achievements be measured by their marital status?
These people pressure these ladies so much that they get married to men they are not compatible with. They get married to men who treat them badly just to get the Mrs. Title.
The annoying thing is that when trouble starts, these same people will start chanting ‘Pray for him to change” like it’s going out of fashion. If his mother couldn’t change him for over three decades, how will his wife change him, is she a magician?
Men and women should know that getting married for the wrong reasons is like courting trouble. People should get married for the right reasons and not because all their mates are married or they are being pressurized to do so.
The right reasons to get married are that you love a person and you want to spend the rest of your life with them, but there are lots of reasons why people get married for the wrong reasons.
If you get married for the wrong reasons, you could find yourself living a loveless and very unhappy existence. You should avoid marrying someone for the wrong reason if you don’t want to resign yourself to a life of misery.
As a woman, the pressure to get married can become pretty intense when you realize that you are the only one left of all your circle of friends that is still single.
But you don’t have to jump into marriage because you are concerned that you are getting too old. You can marry at any age, so wait for the right man to come along before you make such a big commitment.
Getting pregnant for a man is not a right reason to get married. Ladies who trap men with pregnancy are making mistakes. A baby cannot keep a man who doesn’t want to be with you. You will end up living with a man whom you share nothing with except his child.
In some cases, these men feel trapped by pregnancies that they resort to marrying women pregnant for them, but they don’t love them enough to marry them.
Bringing up a child on your own can be tough, but it will be a lot tougher on the child if they are brought up in an unhappy marriage. The stigma attached to single motherhood in Nigeria is also one of the reasons many ladies end up in bad marriages.
If you get married to your partner because you don’t want to lose them, that is a wrong reason to be in a marriage. People stay together because they want to, not because they are forced to by a marriage certificate.
If either party is forcing the other into marriage, then that marriage is guaranteed to fail. If you are really not yet ready for marriage, let your partner know. If they love you, they will wait until the time is right so that you both can build a happy family together.
Young lady, don’t marry a man because he is rich. You have two hands plus a functional brain to boot, go and make your own money. Marriage is not a meal plan or an escape route out of poverty. Work hard for your own money before you get married.
Money is no replacement for a loving relationship, so don’t marry a guy just because of the size of his bank account. Money can make life easier and bring you lots of nice things, but it can also make life more complicated too.
The funny thing is that some people get married to spite their parents, or to get back at an ex. This is a selfish and foolish reason to get married. It won’t bring either you or your spouse happiness. Don’t go and complicate another person’s life with your baggage.
If you think marriage will make you whole, you need a rethink. You don’t need a wedding ring on your finger to be a complete person and, if anything, you need to be well rounded and whole person before you even think about getting married.
Despite what some romantic poems and some love songs might suggest, marriage isn’t the joining of two halves; it’s the partnership of two whole, happy individuals.
You have to know that marriage will not solve all your problems. Don’t get married because you are unhappy and think that marriage will instantly solve everything for you, because it’s also one of wrong reasons to get married.
Marriage comes with its own set of problems and challenges that you will have to face. Marriage, for the right reasons, is a wonderful experience, but if you marry for the wrong reasons, you could just make your problems a whole lot worse.
Whatever the reason may be behind it, cultural or otherwise, no one should be forced to marry a person against their will. People should be allowed to make their marital choices themselves.
You should marry because you want to, you feel that is right for you, and because you love a person. Those are the things that will lay the foundations for a happy and long lasting marriage.