It is expected that you apologize to your partner when you hurt them. Apologies are part of relationships and it can bring couples closer than before if done right.
You can look for the best way to say sorry in a text or do it face to face when you offend the one you love, but failing to apologize can make the offence worse.
When you offend someone, they just want you to acknowledge you hurt them, to feel remorseful, and ask forgiveness.
But when you are unwilling to admit that you have messed up by putting your pride before your feelings for your partner, you will make matters worse.
It is not even apologizing that is the most important thing; it is how and when you apologize that determine whether or not you are forgiven.
Below are 10 wrong ways to apologize to your partner when you hurt them:
You claim they made you do it
This sounds like emotional abuse. Nobody can make you do anything. You always have the power to control your reactions. Even if someone irritated you, that doesn’t mean they made you say or do something nasty to them.
You blame your bad day
Blaming your bad day for hurting your partner is taking an easy way out. Part of being a well-adjusted woman and good member of society is containing your pain and struggles to yourself rather than lashing out at others around you.
You start making it a small deal
Woman, don’t try to downplay what you did. All the talking in the world won’t minimize the pain you caused your partner. You can’t get him to rationalize away his feelings because you don’t want to say sorry.
You do it with a nasty tone
An apology doesn’t mean anything if you say it with an attitude. He will notice it if your words are I’m sorry while your tone is whatever. Your tone should match your words. You can find a romantic way to say sorry to your boyfriend or husband when you hurt them and not be nasty.
You point out when they did the same thing
It doesn’t matter if your partner once did the same thing to you; this doesn’t justify you doing something bad to him in return. This is how to apologize to someone you hurt deeply.
You say ‘Sorry you feel that way’
Saying ‘sorry you feel that way’ is not an apology. You apologize for your actions and not the other person’s feelings. Even if your intention wasn’t to hurt him, if you did, you must take responsibility for your actions.
You remind him of the good things you have done
It doesn’t matter how many times you have done something good for your partner, gave him a ride, or lent him money: that doesn’t earn you the right to hurt him. This is not how to say sorry to someone you hurt. Learn how to say sorry to your boyfriend or husband for hurting him.
You call your partner too sensitive
Calling him sensitive is just another way of avoiding responsibility. Apologizing isn’t about being correct, it is about being genuinely sorry for hurting someone you love. Maybe he is too sensitive but if you care about this person, then just apologize and don’t call him sensitive.
You make your partner apologize too
Apologize to your partner when you do wrong but don’t say, “I will only apologize if you do.” Apologizing is about showing you care about someone. You don’t need them to apologize in order for you to do that. Learn how to say sorry to husband in romantic way.
You become passive aggressive later
If you apologize, and then immediately start giving your partner attitude, your apology is in doubt. Behaving passive aggressively towards the person you hurt shows that you didn’t mean the apology. This is not how to say sorry to husband after a fight.