Do you know what to do when your husband doesn’t love you anymore? Have you taught about this scenario in your head?
Do you know how you will react if your husband tells you he doesn’t love you anymore or you discover through his behaviour that you don’t make his heart skip a beat anymore?
I know some women reading this will be quick to say God forbid but this doesn’t change the fact that people change and they fall out of love with their spouses.
It doesn’t change the fact that many women are cohabiting with men who don’t feel anything for them because they want to save face or pretend to be in happy marriages.
Some men treat their wives like crap but these women keep holding on to these men as if they are their oxygen. It’s sad when something like this happens to you in your marriage but it doesn’t have to be the end of your life. You deserve to be loved.
Dear woman, do you know what to do when your husband doesn’t want you anymore? Do you cry and beg him to have a little regard for him to no avail? Do you call his family members to talk some sense into him? Do you pray and fast for him to treat you like a human being?
A woman sent me a message saying that ‘My husband doesn’t love me anymore and it hurts.” I felt for her. She sounded lost and helpless.
When she called me, she mentioned some things that left me cringing. I started wondering why someone who claimed to love a woman at one point suddenly becomes a man she doesn’t recognize anymore.
She was sad that the man she loves and has three children with doesn’t care about her anymore. He doesn’t even call her whenever he travels or cares to find out how she’s doing.
I know I always tell women not to be naïve or lose themselves when it comes to relationships and marriages. Yes, love is a beautiful thing and it feels good to love someone and to be loved back in return.
But when you are the only one doing the loving and trying so hard to keep your relationship going, there’s a problem. You have to take care of yourself and well being first before trying to kill yourself over a man who clearly doesn’t love you.
I know it would be great to live happily ever after with the man you married and spend all your years with him until you die but unfortunately, that’s not always possible. A lot of marriages in Nigeria are dysfunctional and loveless and it is so sad.
Here are 10 signs you can look out for to find out if your husband doesn’t love you anymore:
*He doesn’t make efforts to work on your marriage.
The woman who told me ‘My husband doesn’t care about me anymore’ is still crying over a man who has stopped putting in efforts to make his marriage work.
If for some time now, you are the only one who is putting some effort into your relationship and your husband doesn’t want to do anything to make you feel loved and cared for and he doesn’t even want to talk about it, he no longer loves you.
*He fights with you all the time.
A man who has stopped loving you looks for little things to fight you over. You can never do anything right or good in his eyes. He sees only your faults and doesn’t appreciate the things you do for him and your family. He makes you feel small and insignificant.
If you can no longer have any normal conversation with your husband because he is always blaming you for everything that goes wrong in your marriage, it means he has no problem making you feel bad. This is one of the signs that maybe he doesn’t love you anymore.
*He doesn’t communicate with you anymore.
A man who doesn’t have qualms ignoring you even when you share the same bed and live under the same roof no longer loves you. If you love someone, you will always want to talk with them, share ideas with them and talk about your day with them.
If your husband has stopped communicating with you and you feel that something’s amiss, it’s a sign that he is slowly falling out of love with you. It may be nothing really but if it persists and he doesn’t want to do anything to change how things are between you two, he has nothing left for you in his heart.
*He is bored with you.
Boredom is part of long term relationships but it takes the efforts of two willing and committed people in a marriage to spice their marriage so that boredom can be a thing of the past. If your husband doesn’t make efforts to make your marriage interesting even if you are making efforts, he doesn’t love you anymore.
As a woman who knows her worth, you shouldn’t put up with this behavior because it’s not something you deserve. If you’re giving him all your love and affection and he shows complete disinterest in making you happy, a man like that is not worthy of being in your life.
*He takes you for granted.
It is sad that a lot of Nigerian men take their wives for granted. They talk to their wives anyhow, treat them badly and even disrespect them before family members and friends and still expect these women to give their best to the marriage.
This is one of the most obvious signs that your husband doesn’t love you anymore. By taking you for granted, he thinks that no matter what he does, you will always be there to put up with his crap. He believes that because you love him and you will always forgive him for neglecting you all the time, while he gives all his attention to other women.
*He is cold and unavailable.
A man who is always cold towards you and unavailable physically and emotionally is not acting like one who still loves you. Love is more than a word; it is actions that determine someone’s love for you. Women, don’t get it twisted. Love is not heartless.
Every time you call him on the phone, he’s unavailable. Every time someone else calls, he’s there. If this continues to happen for a long time, he definitely doesn’t feel anything for you anymore. Not only does he not love you anymore, it may also be that he’s also probably already over you.
*He doesn’t want to have sex.
Sex is very important in marriages. If your husband gives you excuses upon excuses so as not to have sex with you and you have determined that he is okay emotionally and psychologically; then you are just wasting time with a man who no longer gives a hoot about you.
You should know that lack of physical intimacy is one of the most obvious signs that your husband doesn’t love you anymore. If he doesn’t want to be intimate with you, it means one of two things: he either has someone else he enjoys sex with or he doesn’t find you attractive anymore. Whatever the reason might be, the situation is definitely not good enough for your marriage.
*He criticizes you all the time.
This is one of the signs your husband hates you. No man who loves a woman will always criticize her and belittle her for doing something. It is okay if he points out some of the things you are not doing and encourages you to be a better woman but criticizing you with hurtful and damaging words are not what a man who loves you does.
If your husband is constantly whining about things you cannot change, like your looks or your personality, and if he doesn’t let go even after you telling him he’s hurting and insulting you, then his words are actually designed to undermine you. He doesn’t love you anymore.
*He is always out with friends and hanging out with different women.
If your husband is always out and doesn’t like spending time with you, feel free to ask him what the reason is.
If he doesn’t spend enough time with you or your children, then something is wrong especially if he’s not working at the times he’s out or doing his business.
It means that he would rather spend time with his friends and co workers than with you. It may be an indication that he doesn’t find you interesting anymore, that the two of you don’t have anything to talk about anymore as man and wife. Talk to him about it.
*He is cheating on you with different women.
You have proof that he has been cheating on you for years and you think he still loves you? No. It is even bad that he tells some ladies he is wooing that you are dead or he is a divorcee just to have sex with them.
A man who loves you won’t do that to you. He is also disrespecting you and your marriage. It doesn’t matter if you try to justify his actions with the famous ‘men are polygamous in nature’ bullshit. It is not right for your husband to continue endangering your life and health that way.
