Nigerian men are good at covering up one another’s wrong doings, sins and atrocities. They are good at defending one another.
A Nigerian man will know that his brother or friend is just stringing you along in an endless relationship and he will be calling you ‘our wife’ so that you won’t suspect a thing.
A Nigerian man will ask a woman who was been beaten by her husband “What did you do that made him beat you?”
He won’t condemn the other man’s actions. He won’t get angry that a human being was beaten like a goat. That’s not his business. His concern is to divert attention from his friend or brother to the woman.
If you are not careful, these men will turn things against you in a flash and you will become the villain instead of the victim. They do this to rape victims all the time and it is sad.
A Nigerian man will know that his friend and brother has another family elsewhere and he will guard that secret with his life. He will be smiling with the woman he’s presently living with and that one won’t suspect a thing.
I remember the day a woman sent me a message on Facebook. She was angry and distraught and wanted me to tell her what to do.
She discovered that her husband of over ten years was dating multiple women on Facebook and having sex with them without protection.
He even travels outside the state they are based to go and have sex with these ladies. He will tell her he’s traveling for business. He has different lovers in different states.
When she found out, she was angry. She reported him to his friend and guess what that one said…”Why did he allow himself to get caught? He should be smart and should have covered his tracks well.”
The woman asked him if that was the only thing he would say about his friend’s disrespect and deception, he said yes.
He said his friend is a man and men do these things but there’s no big deal because our culture encourages men to marry as many wives as they can take care of.
The woman asked me what she can do to get back at him and hurt him like he hurt her. I gave her the advice I could and shook my head.
It is the same when a Nigerian woman says a man raped her. His friends will ask her what she was wearing or what she was doing in his house. They will turn the case against her and blame her for getting raped.
Is it not shady how Nigerian men don’t know rapists and sexual abusers but the men who carry out these atrocities against women are their friends, neighbors and family members?
One woman recently shared her story on Facebook about how she tried to cover up for her ex husbands lack of finances but he kept lying to her and spending her money on God knows what.
Now, Nigerian men are calling her a desperate woman and blaming her for giving her ex husband money to pay her bride price, rent a house and open an eatery.
Others claim that the man felt emasculated and behaved badly because he didn’t have money. They didn’t reprimand him for lying to her for years.
They didn’t reprimand him for squandering her money on other thongs she knew nothing about. They didn’t reprimand him for disrespecting her. They excused his behavior with not having money.
If you think a Nigerian man will have your back and defend you against his gender, you are on a very long thing. He won’t do that. He will support his fellow man and blame you for being his victim.
Nigerian men are good at covering up one another’s sins, wrong doings and atrocities, trust them at your own peril. They don’t care if their guys hurt you, hit you or stole from you, they will support him.
Women, learn and stop thinking these men will treat you differently when you betray your fellow women. They won’t and you will find out the hard way that they always have one another’s backs.