Some people have self abandonment issues. These people have a hard time trusting themselves, they diminish themselves, and suppress their feelings. They also ignore their relationship needs, and hide their beliefs and ideas in order to please others.
People who have self abandonment issues believe they don’t matter but can do anything to please the people they are in relationships with.
They abandon themselves because they don’t value themselves. They don’t act in their own best interests and don’t encourage or comfort themselves like they do for others.
Below are 10 signs that you have self abandonment issues:
1. You often feel drained, confused and resentful about your relationship. This is because you feel you are inferior to your partner.
2. You overwork yourself to keep your relationship going. You are the only one putting in efforts to make the relationship work.
3. You ignore your needs, boundaries and feelings. You agree to do things that you said you wouldn’t do.
4. You abandon your priorities and goals for that of your partner. It’s as if you don’t exist. You are willing to lose yourself to gain another person.
5. You diminish yourself to keep things stable in your relationship because you are afraid of losing the other person.
6. You allow situations that compromise your values and beliefs just to keep the peace.
7. You accept disrespect and poor treatment from your partner because you don’t want to lose them.
8. Deep down, you know that relationship is not good for you but you continue with it to the dismay of your loved ones.
9. You stay in a toxic, abusive and dysfunctional relationship because you are afraid of staying alone.
10. You keep giving the person treating you badly chances that they don’t deserve. You want to be saved emotionally, and sexually and you depend on your partner for that.
Here are some steps you can take to be better:
1. Love yourself. Take care of yourself emotionally and mentally. Treat yourself with compassion. Acknowledge you are not perfect and forgive yourself for your past mistakes.
2. Be honest with yourself and acknowledge your difficult feelings instead of abandoning yourself when you feel overwhelmed. Talk yourself through your tough moments.
3. Don’t hide who you really are because you are afraid of disapproval or judgment. Know that not everyone is going to like you and that’s okay. Don’t shrink or change to please others.
4. You must feel free to express who you are through your work, life pursuits, dressing and hair. Don’t forget your hobbies, interests, and passion as well.
5. You should start advocating for yourself by setting relationship boundaries. Assert yourself when necessary and don’t be afraid of offending people who want to behave in certain ways to please them only.