In the “Am I The A—hole?” subreddit, a mom of two explained how her parents live three blocks away, and her 9- and 11-year-old kids get to see them often.
But her husband’s parents live several states away and only get to visit a few times throughout the year.
While they plan their visits to the in-laws when the kids are on school breaks, her in-laws come “at random intervals throughout the year,” which means chaos ensues.
“They are excellent grandparents,” she wrote. “With one small exception. They think our rules go out the window when they visit.”
For example: “It’s mean that we don’t make the kids their favourite food every day. Why can’t the kids watch tv with them before they do their chores and homework. Why do the kids have to be in bed so early,” she said, adding, “It drives me crazy that I’m the bad guy because my husband won’t put his foot down so I have to do it.” Yes, that would drive me crazy, too!
The grandparents came last week and took the kids to see a movie after dinner on Monday night. The mom was furious and confronted her husband who “knew that throwing the kids off there schedule screwed me over.”
So, she told him to enforce the rules or she would, and he agreed. But here comes Tuesday night and wait. There’s a hockey game! “He wanted to watch it with our son who loves hockey,” the mom wrote. “I reminded my husband that our son had chores to do and homework. He said it was just a hockey game.”
Not wanting to waste another second to fruitless arguing, she had the kids immediately go get their stuff, and she took them to her parents’ house. She dropped them off and returned home to confront her husband and his parents.
“I went back home and they were waiting for me. I’m being a controlling and abusive person by denying them time with the kids,” she wrote. “I’m not the only person allowed to make decisions regarding the kids. They came all this way to see them and I’m being a jerk by keeping them on a schedule.”
But rather than continue to take their abuse — Good. For. Her! — she changed tactics. She decided they can take responsibility of their actions and make their own rules, and she’s going to relax.
“Wednesday after I picked up the kids from school and dropped them off at home with my in-laws,” she wrote. “Then I went out for the first time in ages. I told my husband I would be out late and didn’t want to wake anyone so I would be at my parents house.”
She wrote that her husband “has been calling and texting and coming over to tell me I need to come home.” The main reason why? “Because the house is a disaster because his parents won’t do anything.” I’m dying laughing right now. Did you think the house just magically cleaned itself, sir? He’s finally realizing what a—holes his own parents are.
“They are in vacation and they are there to see the kids not clean up,” she continued. “The kids are having a fun time with no rules and he has been contacted by the school because no homework was turned in on Thursday or Friday. I didn’t answer those texts.”
She also added an edit to give a small update: “My son just texted me about his gym clothes for today. I guess he never put them on the hamper and they didn’t get washed.
Now I’m wondering what else my husband didn’t get done?” Not her problem! He made his bed, now he can freaking lie in it. That’ll show him to choose his immature parents over his wife again.”