Marriage is good but don’t sacrifice your happiness just to be married

Marriage is good but you don’t have to sacrifice your happiness because of it.

It’s one thing to be married. And it’s another thing to be HAPPILY married.

But Nigerian parents will never differentiate it to their daughter.

“Marry, just marry, time is going.”

“Marry, so I’ll rejoice and shame my enemies.”

We plant in the heart of the girl, that marriage is a phase every woman must pass through for her to authenticate her full happiness.

Your wedding ring becomes an evidence of total happiness. Just flag it at your unmarried friends and show them you are the happiest amongst them.

Your happiness matters most

Many preachers know this weakness. They know. That’s why they always end their sermons by calling out single women to sow seed so that their husbands will locate them very fast. That’s why it’s only the faces of single women that the devil chooses to cover with a dark veil.

Little do we wonder why some women, instead of fleeing abusive marriages, will continue to be shackled to the stench of every form of abuse, because they believe their worth as a woman is tied to marriage. Just any kind of marriage.

But the reality is: everyone will not get married. And it’s neither a sad reality nor a curse. It’s just what it is.

So, why don’t we talk about being HAPPILY single as another good option?

Because happiness isn’t always something a partner offers to another. It is also something one can fully derive by oneself.

Happily married or happily single. Same adverb “happily” exists in both.

And in any of the two, in the end, your happiness is what matters the most.It’s one thing to be married. And it’s another thing to be HAPPILY married.

But Nigerian parents will never differentiate it to their daughter.

“Marry, just marry, time is going.”

“Marry, so I’ll rejoice and shame my enemies.”

We implant in the heart of the girl, that marriage is a phase every woman MUST pass through for her to authenticate her full happiness.

Your wedding ring becomes an evidence of total happiness. Just flag it at your unmarried friends and show them you are the happiest amongst them. Okwu agwu.

Many preachers know this weakness. They know. That’s why they always end their sermons by calling out single women to sow seed so that their husbands will locate them very fast. That’s why it’s only the faces of single women that the devil chooses to cover with a dark veil.

Little do we wonder why some women, instead of fleeing abusive marriages, will continue to be shackled to the stench of every form of abuse, because they believe their worth as a woman is tied to marriage. Just any kind of marriage.

But the reality is: everyone will not get married. And it’s neither a sad reality nor a curse. It’s just what it is.

So, why don’t we talk about being HAPPILY single as another good option?

Because happiness isn’t always something a partner offers to another. It is also something one can fully derive by oneself.

Happily married or happily single. Same adverb “happily” exists in both.

And in any of the two, in the end, your happiness is what matters the most.

Written by Chukwudi Onyegbule

 

Kate

I am a writer, a journalist and phenomenal woman. I don't conform to societal stereotypes. I am passionate about women and the issues that plague womanhood in this part of the world. Engage and be awakened.

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