Couples share some of the lessons they learnt in their first five years of marriage

Popular social media counsellor, John D Doe asked a question that was strictly meant for married couples. He asked: “Married people, if you don’t mind, please tell us how you coped within your first 5 years?”

The question was answered by many social media users and there were some really interesting takes.

Below are some comments people dropped on the post:

Oluchi said:

I kept my marital issues away from my family, hubby did same with his.

Them no understand us. We have been married for 14 years and counting. It took submission, respect, loyalty with the help of the Almighty to stay this long together.

Uche said:

First, I was diplomatic then next made it hot, back to diplomacy and been logical. Somehow things started taking shape as one became much more tolerant but still insisting on the right things been done. It’s not perfect but life is much better and sweeter.

Mazi said:

One big thing I learnt within my first 5 years of marriage is to never argue with my wife. It always ended up with her twisting my words and making the argument unending. I stopped arguing. I started allowing her talk then I used questions to make her rethink. It saved me a lot of stress.

Arrizto said:

For me I learnt, a woman can be kind, loving, loyal but if pushed to the wall, she can do and undo. I also learnt no matter how you push her to do something, she will only do that which she wants (financially). I also learnt never to test a woman’s patience.

Yusu wrote:
Marriage becomes boring as you grow in it, especially when you are well loaded as a man. Some beautiful perfect side chicks will start surfacing. Understanding that the devil you know is way better than the super angel you’re just meeting is the secret that keeps your marriage.

Made wrote:

My husband and I are equal partners in our home. There’s no head or neck or submission in our relationship. We treat each other with love and respect and his family members don’t understand how I do the things I do without him bating an eyelid. The first five years of our union was hard because his family wanted me to be the typical Nigerian wife while my husband insisted I ignore them and their tantrums. I was torn between pleading my husband and pleasing his family. But at the end, I’m glad I listened to my husband because his family just wanted a woman they can use to control him. We have been married for 10 years now and we are good.