How a young man lost the love of his life following societal norms
A young man has lost the love of his life because he was hell bent on following societal norms about women in relationships.
Their meeting was accidental. They bumped into each other in a supermarket on a hot, busy evening.
It was one of those days everyone was in a hurry to shop, beat traffic and get home to relax a bit before rushing off again the next day to hustle for money.
She is a businesswoman who has an innate flair for fashion. She sells trendy wears, jewelries, sun shades, shoes, wristwatches and perfumes on the island.
It was a business she was passionate about. She started this business at 21 immediately after her youth service and at 31, she had three other branches where ladies of different ages go to satisfy their fashion urges.
He is an IT expert with one of the big firms in Lagos. He is smart hardworking and generous but he believes so much that a woman should behave in ways society dictates.
He hates feminists and what they stand for. To him, men and women are not equal because that’s what he has heard his whole life from his father and uncles.
He likes independent women but the ones who know their boundaries clearly and those who don’t try to outshine their men. He believes men should be richer and successful than women.
When they met that fateful evening, sparks started flying. They were drawn to each other instantly. They started a conversation while helping each other pack their provisions scattered all over the floor of the supermarket.
They exchanged numbers and started talking. Their first date was magical. It was like they both imagined it because they were both hardworking, ambitious and purposely driven.
They laid their cards on the table and expressed their feelings sincerely. That was where their story of love, fire and ice started. They started dating.
At first, everything was okay. But then, gradually, Francis started trying to silence Emilia. He would warn her not to do something because women were not supposed to do that.
He would talk down at her because women needed to be controlled and men have authority over women to put them in place. He always reminded her what society expects from her as a woman.
As time went on, he got worse. He started monitoring her online activities. At one point, he suggested that she should give him passwords to her facebook, instagram and twitter accounts but she refused.
It caused a big fight then but she didn’t bulge. She stood her ground and ignored him. Two weeks later, he called her to apologize. He said it was because he loved her so much that made him demand for her social media accounts passwords.
She warned him not to try and control her again because she was already getting irritated by his controlling attitude. They were good for a while until uncle started talking trash again.
He asked her one day why she doesn’t like begging him for money like other girls do. She reminded him that she works for her own money and don’t see the need to pester him for money especially since he’s the breadwinner of his family and his younger siblings and aged mother depend on him for survival.
Uncle lost it. He called her names. He said that if she wasn’t begging him for money that it means she’s begging other men for money.
He claimed his uncles told him so. He also said that’s how things have been since the world began that women depend on men for money and that she can’t make a good wife by being so independent financially.
He called her names and told her to stop pretending. She was lost. She didn’t understand his outburst. She left his apartment that night and vowed never to go back there.
She broke up with him and moved on with her life. Two years later, he called to apologize to her and said he wanted her back because all the women he met before and after her were only interested in money.
He claimed none of them were as intelligent and independent as she was. She allowed him talk and afterwards, she told him to lie on his bed the way he made it because she’s getting married in two weeks time to a man who believes in her and loves her for who she is.
She warned him never to contact her again and wished him luck. She blocked him everywhere necessary and lived happily ever after with her man.
Uncle is living in regret now for losing the love of his life because of societal norms and beliefs. Poor guy.