Don’t make huge sacrifices for men, they don’t deserve it

When I tell women not to make huge sacrifices for men because they don’t deserve it, they accuse me of being hard hearted. They go on and on about how marriage means sacrifice.

I wonder why it is only women who are expected to make sacrifices for men in relationships. Are they alone in these relationships? I pity women who believe they have to put their lives on hold for men.

A Nigerian designer, Fisayo Longe aptly captures my thoughts on women abandoning their lives and making sacrifices for men to live their dreams because they expect to be rewarded in the future.

Read her post below:

“If there’s one thing I have learned from women before me, it is not to make huge life altering sacrifices for men. They don’t deserve such loyalty and commitment.

Don’t make huge sacrifices for men

Sure, compromise here and there. But make sure that your life is still on the path and purpose you intended before him. Most importantly, know yourself and your purpose before any man.”

This has been my message for years to Nigerian women. Stop killing your dreams because of men, relationships and marriages. You will regret it. Nigerian men don’t know the meaning of commitment and loyalty. They think only of themselves and do things they want.

Don’t lose yourself for anyone. You are complete in yourself. You don’t need to stop being you because you want to keep a man in your life.

Give but don’t allow yourself to be used. Love but don’t allow your heart to be abused. Trust but don’t be naive. Listen to others but don’t lose your voice. Be passionate but don’t abandon your dreams because of a man.

If Nigerian women are truthful to themselves, they will learn to put themselves first in relationships and stop giving up who they are, their dreams and aspirations for undeserving men. It’s not worth it.

Kate

I am a woman who is passionate about empowering other women to live their best lives and be free from unhealthy societal expectations. I'm a journalist and a columnist with a reputable media house. I educate, inspire and encourage women to embrace their uniqueness fully. I am a mother to an intelligent girl. I love perfumes.

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