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Ava DuVernay Says It Was Her Decision Not To Be Married Or Have Kids

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Ava DuVernay has joined in on the conversation surrounding successful Black women opting out of getting married and having kids while still living a full life.

Tracee Ellis Ross has become the poster child for that thanks to social media memes created of the actress fitting the “rich auntie” aesthetic, but she is just living her best single, happy life.

“I didn’t see enough examples of different versions of how a woman can find happiness and joy and power and sensuality, sexuality, all of that, without it being through the lens of how I’m seen by a man,” she told Harper’s Bazaar. “People are like, ‘You’re the poster child for being single.’ And I was like, ‘Great.’ But what I would prefer is that I’m the poster child for living my life on my terms. And that there’s a version of that for everyone.”

Ava is making a conscious effort to do the same. The director got her start in television and film later on in life in comparison to her counterparts and so she’s been more so focused on her career, but she’s now learning that life is more than just work. Ava opened up about it to InStyle.

Ava DuVernay

“I’ve gotten a bit stagnant in my relationships with people, the way that I’ve organized my life. We need to keep meeting new people, challenging relationships, moving out of relationships that don’t serve us anymore,” she said.

“There’s that line people say, ‘No new friends.’ But there can be. I can’t mature in my work if I don’t open my life a bit more. I didn’t have kids by choice, and I’m not married by choice. I was able to embrace my career later in life, in my 30s. So I’m going to do what feels good to me, and I’m going to have fun.”

The Los Angeles native worked as a publicist for many years before she picked up a camera and began to make films at 32 years old.

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After the success of her first short film Saturday Night Life, Ava went on to film Middle of Nowhere, I Will Follow and her breakout film Selma. Her seemingly meteoric rise to fame has kept her busy. So, much so that she has been called a “workaholic,” a term she despised. However, she no longer has to worry about being called that because she is making living a full life her priority.

“I feel like I’ve made it through something. We are still in the pandemic, and it’s a tough time. I’m clear about the things that are important to me now and prioritizing things. I’m someone who was a real workaholic and I always resented being called a workaholic because that makes it sound like an addiction of some kind. My work is my heartbeat, and I enjoy doing it, so I always resented it being called something negative,” she said.

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