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Thoughts and opinions

10 things Nigerian women shouldn’t feel guilty about

Nigerian women should stop feeling guilty for putting themselves first in relationships. It is okay for women to look out for their interests and take care of themselves.

This narrative of telling women that they must take care of men even if these men are treating them badly should be discouraged. Women are humans too. They deserve love and care too.

I have listened to some women say they feel guilty for standing up for themselves in relationships. Some women don’t create standards in their relationships because they don’t want to be called hard and unyielding.

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Nigerian women should stop feeling guilty for demanding love, fidelity and respect from their men. These men demand these things from women, so why shouldn’t women have expectations too?

Here are 10 things Nigerian women shouldn’t feel guilty about:

1. Walking away from loved ones who refuse to treat you with respect.

2. Breaking a promise to people who have broken all their promises to you.

3. Having your own needs, desires and dreams.

4. Refusing to sacrifice yourself for someone who won’t help him or herself.

5. Refusing to stay with someone and settle for a life that is not worth living.

6. Refusing to settle temporarily or indefinitely for crumbs of affection.

7. Committing to doing what brings you joy and fulfilment.

8. Disappointing the expectations of someone who only ever disappointed you.

9. Not giving up your dreams and aspirations for a relationship or marriage to work.

10. Saying no to people who continually want to use you for their selfish gains.

Don’t feel guilty for doing what’s best for you means you don’t have to displease yourself or deny yourself what makes you happy just to please others.

Nigerian women need to learn to be selfish with their needs. They need to put themselves first and stop carrying everybody’s burdens. Women, live your life to the full!

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Written By

I am a woman who is passionate about empowering other women to live their best lives and be free from unhealthy societal expectations. I'm a journalist and a columnist with a reputable media house. I educate, inspire and encourage women to embrace their uniqueness fully. I am a mother to an intelligent girl. I love perfumes.

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